25-12-2013, 21:42
What My Mother Taught Me
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE -
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!"
My mother taught me RELIGION -
"You'd better pray that will come out of the carpet.
My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL -
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."
My mother taught me LOGIC -
"Because I said so, that's why."
My mother taught me IRONY -
"If you fall out of that swing and break your leg, don't come running to me!"
My mother taught me about WEATHER -
"It's looks as if a tornado swept through your room!"
My mother taught me HYPOCRISY -
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: don't exaggerate!"
My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE -
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION -
"Stop acting like your father!"
My mother taught me about ENVY -
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
My mother taught me about "ANTICIPATION -
"Just wait until we get home!"
My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE -
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to stay that way!"
My mother taught me about my ROOTS -
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"
And my mother taught me JUSTICE -
"One day you'll have kids...and I hope they turn out just like you!"
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE -
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!"
My mother taught me RELIGION -
"You'd better pray that will come out of the carpet.
My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL -
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."
My mother taught me LOGIC -
"Because I said so, that's why."
My mother taught me IRONY -
"If you fall out of that swing and break your leg, don't come running to me!"
My mother taught me about WEATHER -
"It's looks as if a tornado swept through your room!"
My mother taught me HYPOCRISY -
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: don't exaggerate!"
My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE -
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION -
"Stop acting like your father!"
My mother taught me about ENVY -
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
My mother taught me about "ANTICIPATION -
"Just wait until we get home!"
My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE -
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to stay that way!"
My mother taught me about my ROOTS -
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"
And my mother taught me JUSTICE -
"One day you'll have kids...and I hope they turn out just like you!"