Jokes

(09-01-2012 13:51 )handsomeSOB Wrote:  How do you make a Pirate angry?
Take the P out of him.

For fucks sake ! Straight out a Xmas cracker.

(09-01-2012 14:13 )Boomerangutangangbang Wrote:  For fucks sake ! Straight out a Xmas cracker.

er... y-yeah, a xmas cracker.... not a joke website.... lol

(09-01-2012 15:13 )handsomeSOB Wrote:  

(09-01-2012 14:13 )Boomerangutangangbang Wrote:  For fucks sake ! Straight out a Xmas cracker.

er... y-yeah, a xmas cracker.... not a joke website.... lol

Same place I lift em from.

When Thierry Henry was signed to play for Arsenal again,they said "You feel right at home here,everythings as you left it,including the trophy cabinet"

Having a girlfriend with a tattoo on the back of her neck is a bit like having a magazine in the toilet.It gives you something to read when your in the shitter.

a little boy catches his mum and dad having sex.what are you doing dad? were making you a little brother or sister.the little boy thinks for a while and says do her doggy style i want a puppy

I said to the doctor "I've hurt my cock in a surfing accident".
Puzzled, he said "did you fall off your board??"
"no" I said. "I had to slam the laptop shut when mrs w came in"

Despite removing all the stains from the widows I still lost my job as the Church Window Cleaner

Then I lost my job at the clock factory, and after all the extra hours I put in

A young accountant, straight out of uni, applies for a job advertised in the Sydney Morning Herald. He is interviewed by the owner of a small business who has built it up from scratch. "I need someone with an accounting degree," says the man, "but mainly I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me."

"How do you mean?" says the accountant. "I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters."

"OK," says the accountant. "How much are you offering?"

"You can start on seventy-five thousand," says the owner.

"Seventy-five thousand dollars. How can a business like this afford to pay so much?"

"That," says the man, "is your first worry

Two cavemen are chatting.One says to the other "I'm going to teach my woman to speak" Other says "What harm can it do"