Jokes

Kirsty Gallacher's Home Videos.

Has there ever been a more disappointingly misleading title of a television programme?

My girlfriend recently asked me what i would like her to dress up as to spice up our sex life.

Apparently "an attractive woman" is an unacceptable request.

Does anyone find it ironic how a program aimed at old people is called 'Countdown'?

dave complains to his best mate mike that lovemaking with the wife is becoming a bit routine and boring."get creative dave" says mike"break up the monotony.why dont you try playing doctor for an hour?thats what i do"dave replies"sounds great,but how do you make it last for an hour?"mike says"its pretty easy really,just do what i do and keep her in the waiting room for 59 minutes"

what do toilets and anniversarys have in common?
men keep missing them

(11-12-2009 00:37 )85stevewest Wrote:  what do toilets and anniversarys have in common?
men keep missing them

jokes like this is why no women post in here:-


Q. Why did the woman cross the road?
A. Never mind that, what the fuck is she doing out of the kitchen?

why aren,t there any scousers on star trek?
because they,re not going to work in the future either.....lol,sorry its only a joke.

Q. What's a virgin and a balloon have in common ?
A. All it takes is one prick and its all over.

Q. What's the difference between a whore and a bitch?
A. Whore's f*ck everyone at the party, Bitches f*ck everyone at the party except you.

what are the small bumps around nipples a womans nipples for?
they spell suck here in braille