Jokes

I walked into my sister's room and tripped on a bra.

It was a boobie trap

The definition of a male chauvinist: A man that hates every bone in a woman's body, except his own...

I wrote a book and I highly recommend it for you. It’s a step-by-step guide.

It’s called “How to fall down the stairs”

A guy went to the emergency room, and the Doctor told him: “You have lettuce sticking up your butt.

The man replied: “that is just the tip of the iceberg.”

My car broke down somewhere between the marina and the Hallmark store.

Now I’m stuck between a dock and a card place.

If “womb” is pronounced “woom”, “tomb” is pronounced “toom” then how should “bomb” be pronounced?

“BOOM.”

Steve Jobs would’ve been a better president than Trump.

But comparing apples to oranges is unfair.

Opening a new shadow puppet theatre.

Our business plan says we’ll make a fortune in the first year — but those are just projected figures.

What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes?

Re-Morse code.

Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?

He was just going through a stage.